Oh Deer.........

Yes...fall in the Ozarks. Perhaps one of the scariest times of the year, deer season arrives.

And not just for a week as I first thought. No...there is a week for every weapon known to mankind. That gives everyone a chance to mame and perpetuate suffering to so many more creatures. You know if you can't shoot them with one kind of gun there will be a week for a different type---and if you are a totally lousy shot, there is always a bow and arrow.

Hey--don't get me wrong--I understand keeping the herds under control so we won't be overrun and trampled by millions of wild deer. The thing that bothers me is the total disregard by some so called "hunters" of the art of hunting. Just to go out and shoot something because it is moving---doesn't seem like such a great sport..buy the video game if you just want to shoot things for the heck of it. If you want to use the meat and feed your family that is different.

The other thing about the season that grates me the wrong way is where you can hunt.................not on my property.

Does posting a sign that states no hunting not clear enough--or are some hunters just so backwoods hillbilly they just can't read. Perhaps the sign needs to be just of a picture of a gun or bow and and "no" symbol around it--maybe that would be clearer. I think purple paint is sometimes used.....doesn't work if you are colored blind. So that is my rant about hunting.

The picture above is of a deer head in a tree.................interesting.

Now...a bird feeder is one thing---but hanging a deer head in your tree....that is just too much.

Hide the children.....and the pets......it's deer season....and there are some really lousy shooters out there.

Giddy-up-Budweiser anyone?

Last weekend was very different.....I looked outside and there were 3 draft horses in my front yard. I am talking HUGE horses-draft horses. Like in most cases when something unusual happens at home my husband was not here. I promptly called him on the phone, explained the situation and asked what I should do. He answered right away that I should go up to them and grab the mane of one of them and gently lead them out of the front yard. " OK, maybe he didn't say gently." I asked him if he was aware who he was talking to.......I don't do BIG horses. That's why I was thinking miniature horses--would be my livestock of choice. I know we are given all situations to teach up some kind of lesson, but all I could think this situation was good for was for me to write about it in my blog.

I asked for some advice from some folks that were doing work here and they called over a friend. The friend said that the horses were Amish work horses and for me not to touch them --and to call the county sheriff. I called the sheriff and they told me they were kind of busy and were not sure when they could get by. I finally had to leave for awhile and when I returned the

horses were gone.

The next morning when I got up, there they were again, so I called the sheriff's department again. A nice officer called me me back and I told him about the horses and he then told me that he was from the city and knew nothing about horses but he would come over anyway.

So... I headed down the road and asked of couple of people and finally came across 50+ Amish men all dressed up standing in a front yard. I yelled out to them and asked if any of them had lost a horse or 3. They said no---I didn't realize I had interrupted a church service, but I feel for sure that the Lord didn't want me to keep these horses either.

Finally 4 Amish guys came over in a buggy and led the horses into the woods and about 4 hours later came back to get their horse and buggy.

The saga was over--or so I thought. The horses had left several LARGE deposits in my yard and my dog thought it must be a new shampoo treatment---because for 3 days in a row I had to give the dog a bath from rolling in the fragrant glops of poo....

Oh....how I love life in the Ozarks.....

IT'S A .....WATERMELON!!!!

I have never grown a thing in my life(except for two wonderful kids). The only plant that I have had that lasted over a few days was a lonely sunflower. I did have a cactus once that I was trying to keep healthy. Someone suggested Geritol. This was not a good idea--It turned snow white by the next day.....way too much iron.

Well, just take a look at my watermelon. I know it is a work in progress. But--progress it the key word here--it IS growing. I know it is only about 2-3 inches in diameter---but so was I once--and man did I blossom.

So..................we will see.

Frog Hunting Season?

Everyday I am amazed at life here in the Ozarks. There is actually a season here for hunting frogs. The sport is called Gigging. This is so popular that there is actually a whole endcap at Walmart dedicated to the vital equipment to hunting these wild creatures. It seems to be a long pole (beause you wouldn't want to get too close- being as they are sooo dangerous) with a sharp object on the end of it to neutralize their power. In other words stab them to death. Thus we have Gigging. What would Kermit say! My Cousin Skeeter seems to think this is a great sport and of course even greater eating.

Here is a little frog story I wanted to share::

An older lady was somewhat lonely and decided she needed a pet to keep her company. So, off to the pet shop she went. She searched and searched. None of the pets seemed to catch her interest, except this ugly frog. As she walked by the jar he was in, she looked and he winked at her.

He whispered, "I'M SO LONELY, TOO. BUY ME AND TAKE ME HOME WITH YOU. YOU WON'T EVER BE SORRY."

The old lady figured, what the heck! She hadn't found anything else. So, she bought the frog. She placed him in the car, on the front seat beside her.
As she was slowly driving down the road, the frog whispered to her " KISS ME AND YOU WON'T BE SORRY."

So the old lady figured, WHAT THE HECK, and kissed the frog

IMMEDIATELY the frog turned into an absolutely gorgeous, sexy, young, handsome prince.

THE PRINCE THEN RETURNED THE OLD LADY'S KISS.
SUDDENLY THE OLD LADY FELT HERSELF TRANSFORMING FROM HIS KISS.
NOW CAN YOU GUESS WHAT THE OLD LADY TURNED INTO?
COME ON GUESS!
OOOOOOOHHHHHHH COME ON -- DON'T be silly!
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*
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SHE TURNED INTO THE
FIRST HOLIDAY INN SHE COULD FIND!!!

She's old..... NOT DEAD!

OLD LADIES ROCK!

This is a hair raising place

I have lived here for now 2 years. This community has 2,000 people in it and about a dozen salons and barber shops. NO KIDDING! In that case this should be the most beautiful community in all of America.That is one stylist for every 166 people. I personally have a wonderful stylist. She is classy and talented and way underpayed. She should be in a high end salon making big bucks. She also does the most beautiful nail art and has won competitons. I have included a pic of her doing my friend Lulu's nails.Believe me--she is no dummy.

This brings me to the story of the day. While I was at the salon getting my hair cut today there was a guy there getting a haircut by someone else. He said he was a STUMP GRINDER. It really sounds kind of nasty-so I had to ask what a stump grinder does. He grinds the stumps down after a tree has been cut down and chips the wood and then fertilizes and plants new grass where the stump was. Cool jub-huh?

I explained that I had only been here a couple of years. I think that he and the lady that was cutting his hair got a good giggle from that. I could tell that they were talking about me. I can only imagine what they said. I hope in some way my ignorance of the Missouri ways gave them a chuckle.

That's it for today.

NIght Watch

While everyone is sleeping, there are all kinds of critters creeping around at night.

These are pictures of a couple of raccons that come around each evening--and by the looks on their faces it doesn't seem they like the camera on the tree all set to sneak a shot of them--but it doesn't bother them enought not to come back---

What's Good for the Goose...

Cousin Skeeter here---Well, Denise set up a camera to see what she could see..and looks like the camera saw a goose. There are a pair of Canadian Geese on the pond here....and I think they are going to have little gooses---yum yum---Denise doesn't think it is such a good idea for me to think about eating them. What does she think I am a dummy?--ohhhh.....I guess I am huh....